Dusten Carlson

‘Catfish’ Justin Wants His Own TV Show, Artis Can Come Too [EXCLUSIVE]

Back in late August, MTV’s Catfish introduced the world to Justin Voel-Pel, a sweaty, eccentric online dating vigilante who took it upon himself to teach the episode’s subject, Artis, a lesson about fidelity. You had to hand it to him, it was a pretty clever angle. Justin hid behind “Jess,” a flirty fraulein who was […]

11y ago

miley cyrus

Religious Radio Hosts: ‘Miley Cyrus Sold Her Soul To Satan, Joined The Illuminati’ [Video]

A step-by-step analysis of Miley Cyrus’ MTV VMAs performance will show that she is possessed by a sex demon that she had relations with, and that she probably sold her soul to the devil. In other news, yes, people are still analyzing that performance and unintentionally increasing Miley Cyrus’ public profile. Religious broadcaster Rick Wiles […]

11y ago

Orson Scott Card: ‘Ender’s Game Boycott Won’t Affect Me’ [Video]

Orson Scott Card doesn’t think that a boycott of Ender’s Game will yield the desired effect for critics of his anti-gay views. Card has long been openly critical of same-sex sexual relations and of same-sex marriage, and has even written several articles on the subject. As far back as 1990, he called for anti-sodomy laws […]

11y ago

Joel Osteen|Twitter

Joel Osteen Makes Unfortunate Masturbation Joke On Twitter, Immediately ‘Rubs It Out’ Of His Feed

Televangelist Joel Osteen made a completely unintentional (and hilarious) masturbation joke on Twitter yesterday. I guess you could say that he’s just so pure of heart that he didn’t know a masturbation joke even as it came out of him. The megachurch pastor, best-selling author and adherent to the controversial “profit theology” said, and I […]

11y ago

Chicago|illinois

Chicago Man’s ‘Prank’ Of Shooting People With Paintball Gun Backfires When He’s Shot For Real

Chicago, IL – We probably shouldn’t have to say “don’t go around shooting people with a paintball gun in one of the most violent cities in America,” but here we go. Don’t go around shooting people with a paintball gun in one of the most violent cities in America. That slice of free advice comes […]

11y ago

florida|george zimmerman|Trayvon Martin

Trayvon’s Legacy: No Guns For Sanford Neighborhood Watch Volunteers

Orlando, Florida – The city where unarmed teenager Trayvon Martin was shot and killed by neighborhood watch volunteer George Zimmerman has decided to ban guns for civilian patrols in an effort to reduce the likelihood of such a tragedy ever happening again. The new rules, which will be released during a Sanford community meeting on […]

11y ago

hugo chavez|south america|venezuela|video

Hugo Chavez’s Ghost Magically Appears At Construction Site, Successor Says ‘We Are All Chavez’ [Video]

Caracas, Venezuela – We’ve detailed here and here why Hugo Chavez’s successor Nicolas Maduro, at the very least, has a funny way of saying things. But now he might also be seeing things and, well, that worries us. Maduro, whose obsession with his predecessor Chavez seemingly knows no limit, said that the 58-year-old Venezuelan leader […]

11y ago

Houston|texas

Passersby Take Pics Of Dead Homeless Man Instead Of Calling For Help [Video]

Sometimes that obsessive cultural need we have to document everything we see takes a dark turn. To wit, Houston police say that there could be hundreds of people with photos of a dead homeless man on their phones right now, and not a single one of them called for help. The dead homeless man was […]

11y ago

heidi montag

Heidi Montag Seeks Breast Reduction After Learning Crucial Lesson: Bigger = Not Always Better [Report]

Rumor has it that Heidi Montag is in the market for an 11th plastic surgery, but this time it’s to undo some of the damage from the previous 10. The Hills star is looking for a breast reduction which would bring her bust down to a D. Currently, she’s an F. Did you even know […]

11y ago

Catherine Zeta-Jones|Michael Douglas

Michael Douglas And Catherine Zeta Jones Quietly Reconcile [Report]

Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta Jones appear to have reconciled after they announced in August that they were splitting up. Seems like when they said “we just need a break for a bit” they meant it. At the premiere of his new movie Last Vegas, Douglas was spotted wearing his wedding ring despite being on […]

11y ago

pregnancy|simon cowell

Simon Cowell In Trouble For Smoking In Car With His Pregnant Baby Mama

Celebrity curmudgeon Simon Cowell is getting all sorts of backlash after he was photographed smoking next to his pregnant girlfriend in the back of a car. The 54-year-old TV mogul was spotted smoking in close quarters of Lauren Silverman over the past several weeks. In one instance, he was caught lighting up mere inches from […]

11y ago

Robert Downey Jr

Sober Robert Downey Jr. Is A Major Drag, Says His Former Director [Video]

Robert Downey Jr. is successful, grounded, sober, happily married, and a real drag, says one of his former directors. In an interview with HuffPost Live, director James Toback, who made three films with Downey Jr. between 1987 and 1999, said that 48-year-old actor’s stellar career comeback and new-found sobriety are not what they seem, and […]

11y ago

Halloween|Tennessee

Excessive Force Much? Tennessee Man Shoots 15-Year-Old Who Was TP-ing Neighbor’s House

Franklin County, TN – A 65-year-old man is facing multiple charges after using a shotgun to shoot a 15-year-old boy he spotted TP-ing a neighbors home. Dale Bryant Farris is free on a $125,000 bond after shooting at several teens who were spreading toilet paper around the lawn of Huntland School Principal Ken Bishop on […]

11y ago

Tennessee

Is Obama Going After Red Solo Cup Rights? Yes, Yes He Is [Video]

Congresswoman Marsha Blackburn (R-TN) said Thursday that if President Obama is invited to make crucial decisions about what healthcare plan you’re allowed to choose, there’s nothing stopping him from deciding you can’t use red Solo cups. Or something. At a House Energy and Commerce Committee on Wednesday, Blackburn charged Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen […]

11y ago

Local News Crew Attacked And Maced By Crazed Woman Mid-Report [Video]

This woman really didn’t want to see her neighborhood on the six o’clock news. Camerawoman Danielle Gill and reporter Bruce Johnson of Washington D.C.’s WUSA9 were standing on a sidewalk outside of a home that had been invaded the night before to do a report. It was an interesting story. Apparently, the Southeast D.C.home was […]

11y ago

florida|george zimmerman|Trayvon Martin

George Zimmerman Sends Estranged Wife A Message: A Bullet-Riddled Target [Report]

George Zimmerman allegedly sent his estranged wife, Shellie, a message recently. It was… a little threatening. Let’s put it this way, we don’t think he’s looking to reconcile. Zimmerman and Shellie split shortly after the neighborhood watch volunteer was controversially acquitted in the shooting death of Trayvon Martin. Since the acquittal, Zimmerman has popped up […]

11y ago

Halloween

Craigslist Poster Threatens Legal Action Against ‘N**let’ Trick Or Treaters In His Neighborhood

There seem to be a lot of people going as “racists” this Halloween. A post spotted by WTKR in the “Rants and Raves” section of Craigslist starts strong, admonishing “overage” trick or treaters albiet with some questionable legal support: “Reminder: Overage Trick Or Treaters Stay Out! (Larchmont-Edgewater) “We hate seeing kids older than twelve going […]

11y ago

illinois

Officer Who Allegedly Abused Cassandra Feuerstein Formally Charged [Video]

Skokie, IL – A police officer has been officially charged with aggravated battery and official misconduct after shocking surveillance footage showed that he apparently pushed a female inmate into a bench, breaking several bones in her face. Officer Michael Hart, 43, was placed on administrative leave on Wednesday while the authorities continue to investigate. “I […]

11y ago

New York City

Man Dies After ‘Subway Surfing,’ Was High On ‘Synthetic Marijuana’

A 45-year-old man died after trying to catch a ride on top of a New York City subway car Wednesday. He was apparently trying to “subway surf,” and authorities say that he was high on synthetic marijuana. The man hit his head on a beam overhead as the train pulled into the station on Wednesday […]

11y ago

full house

Remember Derek From ‘Full House?’ He’s A Chiseled, Gay Go-Go Dancer Now

Hey, what happened to that kid who played Derek in Full House? After coming out of the closet three years ago, he decided to become a male go-go dancer. Though his former co-stars the Olsen twins went on to become international superstars, Blake McIver, who played Michelle Tanner’s semi-antagonistic playpal Derek in the classic ’90s […]

11y ago