Ben Affleck Used the Same Old-School Trick to Impress Both Jennifer Lopez and Jennifer Garner

Over the years, Ben Affleck has been connected to several well-known women, but none have drawn as much attention from the public as his relationships with Jennifer Garner and Jennifer Lopez. Both romances have been the subject of constant media attention. Although their marriage ended in 2015, Affleck and Garner have three children together that they co-parent. He then resumed a romantic relationship with Lopez years later, but that marriage also came to an end recently. Nonetheless, Affleck appears to have mastered one similar method of pleasing both women despite all of the challenges he faced.

As reported by The List, the Oscar-winning actor has a surprisingly old-school love language—email. In a 2010 interview with Parade, Garner reminisced about how her romance with Affleck started. She noted that the timing was perfect, as they were both single at the time. She praised Affleck and said, “He’s a very good writer.” When guessed if he impressed her with letters, she said, “Don’t make assumptions. I didn’t say that. Okay...e-mail.” Garner went on to describe Affleck as a remarkably persuasive writer. When asked if she still had his emails, she admitted to keeping every single one of them.

Going forward, Affleck and Lopez rekindled their romance in 2021, as reported by TMZ, after he began sending her emails while she was busy filming in the Dominican Republic. The emails were full of affection and longing, so they weren't merely casual. Affleck praised Lopez's beauty and how much he wished he could be there with her after viewing pictures of her taken on the set. According to the sources, the emails also mentioned Lopez's admiration for Affleck's writing with one especially romantic phrase: that he could win her heart with just his pen.

Reports indicated that, despite the emotional depth of the emails, there was no physical interaction between Affleck and Lopez during that period. Yet, the messages played a huge part in how their rekindled romance moved so quickly. The world got an inside look at these emails—and the playful nickname Pen Affleck—in the 2024 documentary The Greatest Love Story Never Told. However, just two years after their beautiful wedding in Georgia, Lopez filed for divorce on their anniversary day.

Amid the split, an insider suggested that Garner had taken on a role as a sort of mediator in Lopez and Affleck's marriage. The source revealed, "Jen [Garner] feels slightly used as a pawn in J.Lo's bid to repair her marriage. She doesn't believe it was intentional." Garner's friends were reportedly not happy with the 13 Going on 30 star dedicating her time and energy to her ex-husband’s new relationship, as reported by Marie Claire.

Earlier reports had painted Garner as an unlikely supporter of Lopez and Affleck when rumors of a divorce first emerged. It was even said that Garner had forged a friendship with Lopez while co-parenting with the pop icon. Before Lopez eventually filed for divorce, sources claimed that Garner had urged both Affleck and Lopez to try to work on their marriage.