This is how it starts: car full of ‘zombies’ crashes outside Portland
We’re apparently all characters at the start of a zombie apocalypse story, because a news report is being bounced around the internet about a car full of zombies crashing in Oregon.
As the police say the people involved in the accident were “in costume” for a “party,” we can probably expect the reports of rioting and “civil unrest” to start popping up soon, too. The news report even refers to people at the scene being “confused” by the sight of a zombie car crash, so no need to get alarmed about the zombie sightings, folks:
A car full of people dressed as zombies crashed on Interstate 84 near downtown Portland on Friday, causing initial confusion by people who witnessed the crash.
Okay, initial reports blown off by media as misled spectators: check. Police say the car was swerving before it crashed all by itself. I’m no car-crash-ologist, but it sounds like someone inside may have been bitten:
Portland Police said the car was swerving in the eastbound lanes of the freeway just east of the Lloyd District just after 9:30 p.m. when it rolled over and crashed onto its top.
Five people in the car were taken to the hospital for “non life-threatening injuries” after the incident. Of course, if you’re technically not alive… Sgt. Greg Stewart spoke to press to placate the public:
Sgt. Greg Stewart said people who witnessed the crash initially thought the victims’ injuries were much more serious, because of the zombie costumes.
“We’re glad that everyone is alive, despite being ‘undead’,” Sgt. Stewart said, referring to the costumes.
Since it always starts this way, the outbreak doesn’t seem to have been contained:
While everyone in the car was taken to the hospital, Stewart said crews are investigating the possibility that more people were in the car at the time of the crash but fled the scene on foot.
Reports may or may not have proliferated that those present at the scene were said to have described the incident as “brainssss…. brains.”
