Leah Messer Reveals Her Mom Dawn Encouraged Her To Say 2012 Abortion Was A Miscarriage

Teen Mom 2 star Leah Messer reveals that the miscarriage she told fans she suffered during the show’s season 4 premiere was actually an abortion.

In a revealing interview with People, Messer discusses this choice, which she wrote about in her memoir, Hope, Grace & Faith, that hits shelves on May 5.

“I had very low self-esteem at that point in my life and I 100 percent allowed others to control my decision making,” Messer said. She explained in the book that people in her inner circle, including her mother, Dawn Spears, encouraged her to keep the abortion a secret and instead refer to it as a miscarriage. People disclosed that Spears declined to comment.

Messer had hesitations about having a baby with her then-fiancé Jeremy Calvert due to the lingering feelings she had for her former partner (and the father of her 10-year-old twins), Corey Simms. After conversations with her mom and another person in her circle, she decided to take abortion pills, as she wrote in the book.

“I wasn’t able to talk publicly or privately about it because I let the people who were closest to me at the time convince me that it was something I needed to hide,” Messer wrote.

Messer is the mother of three girls: 10-year-old twins Aliannah and Aleeah with Simms, and 7-year-old Adalynn with ex-husband Calvert. The abortion happened a year before Adalynn was born, right in the middle of handling custody issues with Simms and marrying Calvert.

Messer further explained the situation in the book, writing that she called Teen Mom 2 producers to tell them she “lost the baby.” Filming for the season was pretty much complete, so Messer did not think this part would be on tape, but the next morning a film crew was at her door documenting the aftermath of what really occurred — taking the abortion pill. Since she was still in pain from the pill, members of the camera crew caught what they thought were the repercussions of Messer’s miscarriage.

“Looking back now, I just wish I would have owned it. I wish I would’ve owned what was going on,” she said. Messer continued, saying that her fear held her back from telling the truth, but that she won’t dwell on the decision she made at that time. She opened up about what really happened so she could rise above and learn from it.

The truth about her miscarriage is among several tough topics Messer reveals in Hope, Grace, & Faith. She also details the abuse she experienced in her childhood, one of her daughters’ battle with a rare form of muscular dystrophy, and Messer’s struggles with pain pill addiction.