10 Messages From Taylor Swift That Reminded Us About What Growth in Life Looks Like

Taylor Swift Has These 10 Lessons to Impart to Her Fans

Taylor Swift's journey has been nothing short of a symphony of self-discovery and growth in the ever-changing fabric of life. In a cover story for Elle in 2019, she revealed thirty important lessons she learned before she turned thirty, 10 of which really tugged at the heartstrings of her admirers. Swift's lyrical storytelling has frequently highlighted fans' own journeys, but these are direct lessons she imparted to her fans, providing significant truths that continue to alter fans' perspectives of their own lives. Here are ten out of those thirty timeless lessons from Taylor Swift that serve as compelling reminders of what true growth in life requires.

1. Learn to Block the “Noise”

Swift gets so much love on social media, but a lot of the internet can be truly nasty to her too. She says she had to learn "to block some of the noise". She explains, "Social media can be great, but it can also inundate your brain with images of what you aren’t, how you’re failing, or who is in a cooler locale than you at any given moment. One thing I do to lessen this weird insecurity laser beam is to turn off comments." She says she not only turns comments off but also blocks "anyone who might feel the need to tell me to 'go die in a hole' while I’m having my coffee at nine in the morning." The songstress explains that while she loves validation, she also hates it when somebody hits her self-esteem. "I think it’s healthy for your self-esteem to need less internet praise to appease it."

2. “Be Like a Snake”

The Anti-Hero singer shared, "Being sweet to everyone all the time can get you into a lot of trouble. While it may be born from having been raised to be a polite young lady, this can contribute to some of your life’s worst regrets if someone takes advantage of this trait in you. Grow a backbone, trust your gut, and know when to strike back. Be like a snake—only bite if someone steps on you." Basically, she means that it is necessary to react when required. 

3. Learn From Your Mistakes

The Cruel Summer singer explained that "trying and failing and trying again and failing again is normal." She explained, "It’s good to mess up and learn from it and take risks. It’s especially good to do this in your twenties because we are searching. That’s GOOD. We’ll always be searching but never as intensely as when our brains are still developing at such a rapid pace," funnily adding that it's not a reason to text your ex. "It’s fine; do you, you’re searching," she concluded.

4. Body positivity

The Blank Space singer shared that she had a difficult journey learning to love her body. She explained, "I learned to stop hating every ounce of fat on my body. I worked hard to retrain my brain that a little extra weight means curves, shinier hair, and more energy. I think a lot of us push the boundaries of dieting, but taking it too far can be really dangerous. There is no quick fix. I work on accepting my body every day." 

5. Aging is NOT BAD

The songstress hit at patriarchal culture, which teaches women that aging is a bad thing. She wrote, "I’ve learned that society is constantly sending very loud messages to women that exhibiting the physical signs of aging is the worst thing that can happen to us. These messages tell women that we aren’t allowed to age." Adding that "It’s an impossible standard to meet," adding a special shoutout to actress Jameela Jamil, she wrote, "I’ve been loving how outspoken Jameela Jamil has been on this subject. Reading her words feels like hearing a voice of reason amongst all these loud messages out there telling women we’re supposed to defy gravity, time, and everything natural in order to achieve this bizarre goal of everlasting youth that isn’t even remotely required of men."

6. “All That Glitters Is Not Gold”

Swift wants us to know the true things that matter in relationships. She advises that before jumping into relationships, assess not just the charm they show upfront, "but the layers of a person you discover in time." Ask these questions, Swift says, "Are they honest, self-aware, and slyly funny at the moments you least expect it? Do they show up for you when you need them? Do they still love you after they’ve seen you broken? Or after they’ve walked in on you having a full conversation with your cats as if they’re people? These are things a first impression could never convey."

7. Don’t Let Outside Opinions Establish Your Value

"I learned not to let outside opinions establish the value I place on my own life choices. For too long, the projected opinions of strangers affected how I viewed my relationships," the Bad Blood singer shared. She feels like this comes from her seeking approval, but it's important to learn not to ascribe your whole ideals to the outside world's opinions. "Whether it was the general internet consensus of who would be right for me, or what they thought was “couples goals” based on a picture I posted on Instagram. That stuff isn’t real. For an approval seeker like me, it was an important lesson for me to learn to have my OWN value system of what I actually want," she concluded.

8. Believe the Victim

This is an important one, for not just Swifties but everybody. "It’s my opinion that in cases of sexual assault, I believe the victim. Coming forward is an agonizing thing to go through. I know because my sexual assault trial was a demoralizing, awful experience. I believe in victims because I know firsthand about the shame and stigma that comes with raising your hand and saying 'This happened to me.' It’s something no one would choose for themselves. We speak up because we have to, and out of fear that it could happen to someone else if we don’t."

9. Learn the Difference Between Lifelong Friendships and Situationships

Taylor Swift wants her admirers to know the difference between actually chosen families and just people who are there and contribute nothing to your life. She says, "Something about 'we’re in our young twenties!' hurls people together into groups that can feel like your chosen family. And maybe they will be for the rest of your life. Or maybe they’ll just be your comrades for an important phase, but not forever. It’s sad but sometimes when you grow, you outgrow relationships. You may leave behind friendships along the way, but you’ll always keep the memories."

10. Never Forget the Ones Who Stick Around

The songstress has been canceled by social media often and feels like she knows who cares for her and who doesn't. "I learned that I have friends and fans in my life who don’t care if I’m #canceled. They were there in the worst times and they’re here now." For her now, she feels, it's important to never forget the people who stuck around for her. She explains, "The fans and their care for me, my well-being, and my music were the ones who pulled me through. The most emotional part of the Reputation Stadium Tour for me was knowing I was looking out at the faces of the people who helped me get back up. I’ll never forget the ones who stuck around."